www.i-got-screwed.org is a positive editorial style self help website highlighting the top 10 lessons I learned the hard way about doing business with dishonest, immoral people -- what to watch out for in their personalities -- how to beat them at their own crooked games with great inspirational quotes.

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TOP 10 | PSYCHOLOGY of BULLYING PROJECTING BLAMING

HOW MY SETTLEMENT MEETING BEGAN

by Gary G. Ballard, watchdog ethics blogger in San Diego, CA USA

"Why are we here?" the leader of a large company asked me at the start of our meeting (when the answer could not have been more clear to anyone who actually read my complaint brief).

Midway through the meeting the same person said, "That's not how (we do) business," but those words proved disingenuous as well because the evidence shows that is exactly how they do business.

Then he and his cohorts proceeded to steal my money, my income property and destroy my business, my good name, and my mammoth professional legacy.

The TRUTH, the FACTS are offensive to these people because they hold a MIRROR to their face and they don't like what they see looking back.

But in reality, who wouldn't want an effective charismatic leader of low moral character to do the people's dirty work while they look the other way and receive millions of dollars in unjust enrichment?

History, relationships, governments and the business world are full of such amoral characters and criminal scenarios.

BACKSTORY:

Without backstory, igotscrewed may appear an odd bird, but we are here because I believe good people should not be unfairly punished for respectfully standing up for themselves and speaking the truth in their defense.

And to create a positive Web portal to share life's universal hard lessons learned and tips about how to avoid making the biggest mistakes in business.

Some people may not understand the Why Factor, the Good Fight, wisdom or quotations until they’ve either lived long enough, or walked in the shoes of someone who’s been seriously screwed over in an unfair work environment. And this resource is for them.

My own troubles with formerly-trusted business associates provided me this voice and motivation so honest hard-working nice people may benefit and learn from my real-world negative experiences and hopefully get over getting screwed:

www.sycuanbandofthieves.com

I love this quote (if you can afford to take it or young enough to start over) -- but I can’t help wondering if Bill got screwed and got over it, or if he screwed people over and was telling them to get over it.

Even Steve Jobs’ (Apple cofounder) biography contains this paradox of his cold-blooded ruthlessness to get ahead versus doing the right thing by his team members when his company could well afford to.

Though Steve seemed pretty adamant about protecting HIS good name, HIS intellectual property and HIS family treasure.

My best top ten greatest lessons I’ve learned the hard way about doing business:

#1: When you catch someone stealing from you red handed, you are sure to be the Bad Guy for daring to respectfully ask them for an explanation.

2) SIGNED CONTRACTS rule business relationships.

If your client (or vendor) doesn't want to sign a meaningful enforceable contract -- except when it serves them, like their NDA Non Disclosure Agreements -- I would be leery of working with them unless you have more to gain than lose -- and certainly not long term.

3) Any contract is only as good as the people behind it, so choose your associates wisely -- or you are practically guaranteed to have problems later when someone wakes up one day and decides he doesn’t like the contract because he will surely try to weasel out of it.

4) Putting unqualified, unprofessional friends and family in management positions is very risky business — they are bound to make serious mistakes on the job that can adversely affect working people's lives and put a company and its officers in dishonest positions.

5) People get real squirrelly when substantial money is involved -- in breakups, divorces, splits, settlements, inheritances, offers, parting ways, nutty terms and conditions, whatever.

Unless they are Paying to Play, Killing Stories, Bribing the Justice System, Hiring Killers kind of stuff.

Or blowing someone else's money on foolishness....

6) THE GOLDEN RULE OF BUSINESS:

After more than 25 years as a professional self-employed independent contractor, I believe I've stumbled upon my number one Golden Rule of doing business:

“In looking for people to (do business with), look for three qualities: integrity, intelligence, and energy. And if they don't have the first, the other two will kill you.”

- Warren Buffett (Businessman, 1930-)

7) If you don't check the grass for snakes it's hard to complain about being bitten.

SEE SNAKE-IN-THE-GRASS.COM FOR MORE OF LIFE'S GREATEST QUOTES, ANECDOTES AND WISDOM ABOUT GETTING SCREWED OVER IN THE BUSINESS WORLD AND HOW TO "GET OVER IT".

FREE HIGH-RESOLUTION SNAKE POSTER DOWNLOADS:

1) Original large rattle "Snake In The Grass" art posters close-up. 2) "No, no, if you help me, you will be my best friend. I will treat you differently." 3) "If you don't check the grass for snakes it's hard to complain about being bitten."

GIRL AND THE SNAKE STORY teaches young boys and girls life's lessons about the Spiritual and Mythological nature of snakes in history.

8) PREDITORS INSTINCTIVELY KNOW who they can lie to, bully, manipulate, steal from and destroy with calculated risks of getting a black eye or shot in retaliation.

Most of them are cowards at heart.

They don't steal from the mob, people who are hooked up or fighters because they prey on the weak and the soft.

How empathy became a weakness.

Perceived American values of empathy have drastically changed since I grew up in the late 20th century.

In 2025 empathy seems to have become the ENEMY -- an undesirable weakness on your team to expunge (or plunder).

I remember the better companies and leaders at least gave the appearance of having traits like good character and honor -- they knew when to resign and the justice system could follow the law without fear of presidential retaliation.

So be aware of the vibe you send out -- it could be the reason you didn't get the job or a signal to predators -- you are trustworthy, gullible and soft ... a liability to your family and company.

I am a:

Let's put the facts on the table and let the cards fall where they may.

Type person.

If that makes me look WEAK or SOFT or a SUCKER -- then blame my Mother for raising me to be an Honorable, Hard-Working Man whose Word is good -- NOT A SCUMBAG!

The Oldest Tricks in the Book:

BULLYING -- PROJECTING -- BLAMING

“Bullying consists of the least competent most aggressive employee projecting their incompetence on to the least aggressive most competent employee and winning.”

- Tim Field (Author)

Interesting the writer sees the bully "winning" (the fight?) — I guess he is correct in some perverted sense, however, the company loses the competent worker and its workplace wars continue under the dysfunctional management.

PSYCHOLOGICAL PROJECTION

WIKIPEDIA: Psychological projection was first conceptualized by Dr. Sigmund Freud (1856-1939) as a defence mechanism in which a person unconsciously rejects his or her own unacceptable attributes by ascribing them to objects or persons in the outside world instead. Thus, projection involves projecting negative qualities onto others, and is a common psychological process....

This is an important concept to learn about because if we don't stand up and tell people who we are (we passively shrink back from others), it makes us a prime "object" that people will "project" their negative traits upon.

For example, a dishonest, evil or self-hating person will gravitate to calm, non-aggressive people and project their dishonesty and violence on the less-dominate personalities.

The first line of defence against these types of attackers is to stand up and tell people who you are (or people will naturally project themselves upon you) — which can't be good if you have to be around jealous, insecure, dishonest, incompetent or violent people, or people who hate themselves.

The real pisser about getting unfairly screwed over is the psychological phenomenon: VICTIM BLAMING (Wikipedia).

Victim blaming is when people and/or laws perceive a victim as being fully or partially responsible for acts of wrongdoing committed against them regardless if they did nothing wrong.

Blaming the victim exists in human society most flagrantly in racist, sexist, and classist forms where the victim is not able to defend himself or herself against a wealthier, more-powerful, better-connected perpetrator.

Under the guise of victim-blaming "justice," victims get screwed over and over for speaking up for themselves, the perpetrator moves on unpunished, and good people can ease their minds by rationalizing the victim must have done something to warrant the abuse in the first place and thereby got what they deserved.

DOWNLOAD FREE HIGH-RESOLUTION GOOD FIGHT QUOTES POSTERS.

FREE HIGH-RESOLUTION CHARACTER QUOTES: 1) Original 2,800 wide poster.

How a person fights back or deals with being wronged mostly depends on his or her personality and the backbone and morals their mother or father or guardian instilled in them as a child.

“Life is a fight, but not everyone’s a fighter. Otherwise, bullies would be an endangered species.”

- Andrew Vachss (Author)

I can still hear my grandma telling me: “Forget those people, and let your hard work be your measure.” However, good measure doesn’t pay the rent or the hospital bills when your children get sick.

“Each of us is a book waiting to be written, and that book, if written, results in a person explained.”

- Thomas M. Cirignano (Author)

“People aren't that complicated, Joe, good people, bad people, they generally look like what they are.”

- "The Spanish Prisoner" Jimmy Dell

- Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr. (Activist, 1929-1968)

“I am afraid we must make the world honest before we can honestly say to our children that honesty is the best policy.”

- George Bernard Shaw (Playwright, 1856-1950)

“Knowing what's right doesn't mean much unless you do what's right.”

- Theodore Roosevelt (US President)

“If you're horrible to me, I'm going to write a song about it, and you won't like it. That's how I operate.”

- Taylor Swift (Singer)

“The defense to slander is truth.”

- Perry Mason (Character, TV attorney)

“Don't pee on my leg and tell me it's raining.”

- Judge Judy Sheindlin

“When people hurt you over and over, think of them like sandpaper. They may scratch and hurt you a bit, but in the end, you end up polished and they end up useless.”

- Chris Colfer (actor/singer, 1990-)

- Richard Nixon (37th US President 1913-1994)

THE NBCNEWS.COM HEADLINE: "Murdered for her organs while on vacation?"

What do you say to this child's family (assuming it's true and that they had nothing to do with it)?

How low will greedy people stoop to make a few dollars?